The New Generation

For some time now I've been working to create a name for myself in this industry as a media personality. It's definitely an uphill battle but I'm determined to keep working and get where I want to be. Over the years I've come across many who have claimed to support me but secretly didn't, many who have straight up laughed at me, many who put me down and criticized me and a few who have genuinely supported my efforts.

Being a part of the younger generation in this industry AND a female I've seen first hand how difficult it is to honestly be taken seriously sometimes. It was something that bothered me for years and it continues to bother me until this day. Many in the older generation who have already made their mark refuse to believe that some of us in the younger generation actually wish to see this industry progress with time as well as our personal careers and brands. They think this is just a hobby.

I'm not trying to bash the older generation, but for the longest time all I heard was criticism (and no, not constructive criticism). It was the type of criticism that people give when they're trying to tell you to quit or trying to say you'll never make your mark because 'you're too naive', or 'things are easy for you guys now a days'. Many who have been through the phase we're going through now as the 'newbies' are so quick to tell us what we're doing wrong but don't necessarily tell us what we're doing right. 

 The older generation who saw this industry at it's peak have seen a lot more than we have.  They know the tricks of the trade and have a lot more wisdom and knowledge than we do. People can complain that this industry is dead or going downhill as much as they want but in order to truly progress as an industry it is ESSENTIAL for the older generation to be an active part of our growth. At the end of the day, there's only so much someone can learn without a mentor or guide. By the time we gain as much knowledge as they do, it'll be time for the next generation to take a stand and learn from us and our time will have passed. 

Now here's the disclaimer: I'm not saying that everyone who's more experienced in this industry is completely wrong in any way. There are a handful of folks who genuinely support the younger talent in our community and we truly appreciate that. But those who aren't: sitting back and watching us make mistakes will not help the industry prosper. We will value any constructive criticism or input you'd like to give us. To those who I've personally seen genuine support from, like Raju Sethi, Amen Panesar, the team at SimplyBhangra.com, anyone else I may have missed and last but not least my late father who I'm sure is supporting me from up in heaven, thank you. Thank you for being mentors and guides and working to truly see the newcomers in our industry succeed.

PS: It's been one year today since I joined the Simply Bhangra team! Yay! 

Father's Day Without Him

This was my second Father's Day without my father and I have to say it was one of the most difficult days I've had to deal with in a while. I expected to see pictures of people and their dads all over social media and had prepared myself for it, but I didn't expect to feel as lonely as I did. The week before Fathers Day I found myself stressing over the little things. I was cranky, I was anxious and I was desperate to find ways to distract myself for the following Sunday. I had a pretty busy couple of days before Fathers Day, so I slept in, not having the smallest bit of motivation to get out of bed. Overall I tried my best to stay off social media and not watch TV knowing I would end up getting emotional, so I turned my attention to Netflix to finish whatever I hadn't watched of Orange Is The New Black Season 4. (Don't worry I won't ruin it for you if you haven't seen it yet).

I did wish my father-in-law to-be a happy Fathers Day and it gave me some comfort knowing that next year I'll have a father to celebrate with but a piece of my heart was still missing. I spent my dad's last Father's Day before he passed in a completely different state. Back then it hurt me knowing that it was the first Father's Day we had spent apart but later on it hurt even more not being able to celebrate with him again. I was hoping that feeling would go away but unfortunately losing someone, specially someone you're that close to doesn't get any easier. As time goes on you find more ways to control your emotions and distract yourself but the pain is still there. 

I thought the best way to get through the day would be to not let myself shed a single tear, but I was wrong. As the day went on I found it more difficult to hold my emotions back, causing me to cry for over an hour without being able to stop. I realized I should have allowed myself to be emotional and cry throughout the day when needed. Bottling up those feelings did nothing but make me feel worse. It's important to reminds yourself that crying when you're upset is totally okay! Everyone has different ways of dealing with sadness, so if you're ever feeling down for whatever reason, just find what works for you. It could be spending time with a bunch of friends or family or keeping to yourself for the day. Having your favorite food is never a bad idea so I chose to order my favorite takeout meal, chicken and rice from Delhi Garden in Edison! 

Whatever your method of dealing with emotions is, regardless of what may be causing you sadness and pain, you're not alone. That's the reason I chose to write this post. I don't want or expect anyone's sympathy. For anyone who's reading this and who needs to be reminded that there's always someone who understands what you're going through. So if you're going through something that's bringing you down, keep your head up and deal with it in the appropriate way that work for you. It's okay to be upset and grieve during difficult times, but the important thing is to pick yourself back up as soon as you can. Mourning the loss of a loved one, specially on a day like Father's Day is okay, but always give yourself the strength to pick yourself back up after you fall.

As I end this post I'd like to thank those who helped me through a difficult day and those who convinced me to write this post despite my hesitation. You know who you are. Thank you.

 

Female Bhangra Teams For The Win!

This is a topic I've written about before but I feel the need to do so again.

Bhangra is a dance form from Punjab. Originally the dance was performed by men, but as its popularity has spread all over the world, it's been popular among both men and women with co-ed and all female bhangra teams. Females in the bhangra community have striven to make their mark and many have done so. But even in 2016 some discourage women from doing bhangra and believe it's 'inappropriate'. Although female bhangra teams participate in competitions all over the world, some organizers still refrain from allowing females to take part in these events simply because of their gender, specially for live bhangra.

Although bhangra started off as a dance form solely for men, peoples thoughts have evolved and times have changed but there are a select few who are not comfortable with that change. In our culture we're taught to treat everyone equally. But why the inequality when it comes to bhangra? Some may say that men wouldn't do giddha (a Punjabi dance meant mainly for females) although Malwai Giddha is becoming more recognized. I'm sure that in the future if Malwai Giddha teams wanted to compete or show their skills at an event they would be accomodated somehow. Times DO change. The main focus should be to keep this art form alive, and that's what most bhangra dancers, male or female, aim to do. I believe that a woman's choice to do bhangra or giddha should be solely HER choice and she shouldn't be judged for scrutinized for it. Do people really believe that our traditions will remain exactly the way they were over a hundred years ago?

I had the chance to speak to a few people who are currently involved in the circuit and have been in the past. Here's what they had to say:

 "I started off in bhangra back in 2008 with Bhangra Knightz when very few girls teams were present in the circuit. As I learned more  about bhangra I always questioned why girls weren't in the scene as much as guys were. It wasn't until 2010/2011 that I started to see girls team like Toronto All Star Girls, Shaan Mutiyaaran Di and PANJ emerge and completely dominate the circuit. I'm very big on woman empowerment and in 2013 I made it a goal of mine to bring together a girls team in the Bay Area and thus Royal Bhangra Girls was born. We started off small with melas and small shows and eventually made our way up over the years to perform on one of the biggest stages of all time, Bruin Bhangra. We had an amazing reaction and so many supporters. I believe the bhangra circuit is making progress with shining the light on girls doing Bhangra and proving that girls can dance equally if not better than guys. There are however, many out there that still cannot wrap their heads around girls doing bhangra especially live bhangra where girls have proven that they can out dance an all guys live team ex. TAG girls at MCB 2015. To all those naive people I would just like to say its not 1996 anymore people we are in 2016 and whether you like it or not girls are coming up and their presence will be know and I along with many others will fight for the cause."-Ranjit Nijjar- Coach of Royal Bhangra Girls, California

" I began competing in 2005 with Stanford Bhangra. During that time I can only recall 2 all girl teams, UBC girls from BC, Canada and Sherni Di Shaan from Berkeley, California. Since then a lot more girl teams have joined the scene.  In 2007 I remember UBC girls doing a live segment at Bruin Bhangra, it was about 2 and half minutes but they still did an amazing job. After that came Jawani Bhangra, also from BC, and almost all of their performances started off with live segments which was great to see. After watching them I knew it wasn't gonna be too long until a girls team did a full live set. At 2011 Nachda Punjab, for the first time in bhangra history an all girls live team emerged, Allarh Mutiyaaran Punjab Diyaan (AMPD), although they weren't the cleanest live team, they brought this energy level that I thought only a selectfew guy's teams had. They opened new doors for all girls doing bhangra. I myself had the chance to play with another all girls live team, Shaan Punjab Di.  I played for them at 2 competitions and had a blast playing for them. After our Warrior Bhangra performance I knew we had a high chance of placing. Some of the judges were shocked by our performance (even the few that didn't like girls doing bhangra). It's 2016 and looking back from 2005 to now female bhangra teams have truly evolved. The only sad part is there are still a few people who feel like it's wrong and think that the girls can't keep up with the guys. It's more sad that guys who used to make bad/vulgar comments about girls and bhangra are the same ones hosting bhangra competitions and are doing what ever they can to make sure girls teams don't compete against guy teams. It's 2016 some people still living in the past. For all the girls out there, continue to do bhangra and don't let anyone tell you that you can't. As a matter of fact, girls actually respect bhangra more then most guys." - Gagan Dholi

 "Jawani Bhangra faced much discrimination by leaders in the bhangra community, esteemed judges told us we should stick to giddha etc.  It deterred us from furthering our style as a folk team, and naturally we went to the more modern gimmicky fun side.  It wasn't all what we wanted but it's kind of the direction we were molded. Personally the objective aspects such as stamina formations technique facial expression etc. are the same in male and female teams and if the girls can step up then why not let them compete in the folk comps.Until the current generation of "Uncles" and "Paaji's" are retired from the scene, the blatant sexism will continue because it's ingrained in them.  For the girls who want to take it folk, do your thing!  If you feel discriminated against, SPEAK UP.  Ask questions, don't take judging decisions as the word of God and keep at it.  You don't know who is watching you and getting encouraged, and it's all a part of the learning process for the circuit as a whole. " -Bharathi Sandhu

"Women face discrimination every day and it's no surprise when I say that in Bhangra, us girls face it too. We're looked down upon and are always discouraged. So that's why when I step up on that stage, I do it for the people who never had faith in me. I do it for the people who didn't believe that girls could be something more than a stay at home wife. I do it to show how empowering women are when given the chance. But most of all, I do it for myself. To prove to myself that I am so much more than the powerless and frightened young girl that people always saw me as." - Nimrat Brar- Royal Bhangra Girls

I also had the opportunity to speak to Daljit Mann from AVA Girls. Although the team is no longer active, Daljit was kind enough to share her thoughts with me. She explained that certain songs or moves were 'off-limits' in a sense due to the fact that they weren't necessarily appropriate for females. Despite these minor setbacks these girls worked tirelessly to be able to execute a routine on stage as perfectly as they could. Despite their efforts there would be occasions where judges would favor male teams and make remarks about how girls shouldn't be doing bhangra. She also mentioned that some parents would be against their daughters dancing and didn't find it appropriate. 

This is still a huge issue today. I'm blessed to have had a father who supported my decisions and career choices and that is the only way I'm here working for what I love to do. Parents- I hate to say it but your daughters could be out doing things much worse than bhangra. So if your daughter chooses bhangra as a way to express herself you should truly be thankful and support her. Bhangra is still a part of our culture and although you may feel uncomfortable having your daughters perform at certain events, there are always Teeyan Da Mela's or others that you may feel comfortable with. Please go out and support your daughters. Be at their competitions and cheer for them! It will mean so much more to them than you think. From what I've seen, female bhangra teams are almost like a sisterhood. These ladies create life long  friendships, work extremely hard with dedication and determination, and keep our culture alive. Times ARE changing. So either role with it and accept the changes or get left behind. As for those ladies who dedicate their evenings or weekends to their bhangra teams, working tirelessly to perfectly execute that routine on stage despite the harsh criticism- what you do takes a lot of willpower and hard work, KEEP SHINING :)

 

 

 

 

Ways To Overcome "Resting B*tch Face"

'Resting B*tch Face' (RBF) is a problem many women, including myself, have to deal with on a daily basis. The way our faces naturally rest when we have no emotion makes us look angry, mean, upset, or in other words a complete b*tch. I've had a lot of people come up to me and ask me if I'm ok, or tell me that before they spoke to me they assumed I was arrogant because of RBF. It's not something that we can really change, but here are some tricks I've used to help overcome it! Now I know plenty of ladies love having the "angry" look on their faces and that's totally cool, do you! But this post is for those of you who are tired of seeming unapproachable or just want ways to be more outgoing!

1. Smile! I know it's weird to smile for no apparent reason and people will probably assume you're insane so I wouldn't suggest that. But smile at people you cross paths with on a day to day basis! Even if it's just a little smirk, this way people know they can approach you and have a conversation. Who knows, your smile could actually make someone's day! For instance if you went to a mall, restaurant, or any public place in general and someone held the door open for you, smile when saying thank you! It's the little things!

2. Practice the half smile. In situations where it may not be appropriate to have a huge grin on your face, the half smile shows that you're friendly enough to approach without making it seem like you're a little too excited. Also, the 'half smile' prevents people from asking you if everything's okay or if you randomly need a hug. Just turn the corners of your mouth slightly upwards while still keeping your face relaxed and that should do the trick!

3. Introduce yourself! We've all been in situations where we don't seem to know anyone. If that's you or someone around you, be friendly! This way if someone didn't feel like they could approach you because of RBF they'll be more comfortable knowing that you're actually friendly despite the lack of expression on your face. Being involved in conversation is extremely important. Don't know how to join in? Ask a question! Don't know about the subject being discussed? Again, ask a question!

4. Make an effort to reach out to people. Whether it's following them on Instagram, or sending a text saying "It was nice meeting you", it's always nice to show that you have a friendly side despite the look on your face. Plus if there's a possibility that someone may still assume you're as mean as you look then you have all your bases covered! 

5. Joke about dealing with RBF! This is something I do quite a bit because 1. I actually find it hilarious that as outgoing and friendly as I am, I still manage to look SUPER intimidating so there's no harm in laughing about it here and there!

If you know of any more tips or tricks to overcome Resting B*tch Face, comment below! Hope you enjoyed this post! Be sure to let me know if there's any other topics you'd like me to write about. Thanks for reading!

 

Consistency is Key!

If you've been following my blog or Youtube channel, you know that the biggest problem I have is staying consistent with my posts. As consistent as I want to be, sometimes life just gets in the way and I tend to get off track. Now, it's time to change up my daily routine to help me stay on track and as consistent with my posts as possible because I'd rather not waste any more valuable time.

Here are some things I plan on doing to make myself a new daily schedule in order to stay focused on all of my short term and long term goals! I hope they'll make it a bit easier for me to stick to a routine and hopefully they'll help anyone else who could use a little motivation!

1. Set realistic goals. As much as I would like to film 10 Youtube videos a day or run 5 miles in one workout, I know that'll never happen. So I'll be setting goals that challenge me just enough without making me feel overwhelmed. I've heard that it takes at least 21 days to turn something into a new habit. Take baby steps instead of one giant leap! Once you see that it's now easy for you to reach a daily goal, set a new one! In my opinion, it's the easiest way to set realistic expectations for yourself and to see what exactly you can handle.

2. WRITE IT DOWN. I always tell myself there's no need to write certain things down but boy am I wrong. All I tend to remember is that there was something I needed to remember which doesn't help my situation. It's time for me to clean the dust off my trusty dry erase board from high school and put it to good use. Earlier this week I wrote my entire daily schedule down along with reminders to drink water (which I desperately need or I'll forget to drink water all day) and any deadlines I have for that week or month.

3. Create a vision board. It's always good to stay motivated and one way to do that is to have something to constantly remind you of your long term goals. Over this long weekend I plan on creating a vision board with everything I hope to accomplish career wise, fitness wise, and anything else that comes to mind. Within the year I hope to at least accomplish a portion of what I have on my vision board.

4. Schedule some time to relax. I often get over ambitious which causes me to fall off track very easily. So this time I plan on scheduling breaks throughout the day to just chill back, watch some Youtube videos, listen to music, catch up on social media or even take a nap. Having a few minutes throughout the day to kick back will definitely give me something to look forward to throughout the day. Who knows, maybe I'll get so used to my new routine that I won't even need to take a break!

5. Change up your schedule as needed! One piece of advice was given is to not feel obligated to stick to your exact schedule if there's something that doesn't work! By changing your schedule a bit you create a more relaxed environment for yourself and are more likely to stick to your routine!

I'll definitely be putting all of these tips and tricks to good use starting this weekend. If you try any of these or have any other helpful tips feel free to share! 

What If

More often than most, I lose motivation for everything I do. 

There's so much I could say but I can't seem to put it into words.

But what I will say is always thinking "What if..." is the worst feeling in the world. There are a lot of steps I either took a very long time to take or didn't take at all and I've almost always regretted it. Whether it's reaching out for a certain event or opportunity, finishing a project or even something as simple as buying a new item of clothing. Thinking 'what if' destroys my inner peace every single time.

My anxiety always ends up getting the best of me. Those around me may assume I'm just lazy, unprofessional or don't care enough, and I won't try to correct them. I can only correct them if I myself what's going on in this head of mine sometimes. I know there are some out there who probably wonder why I've gone ghost, and there are many more who simply consider it a joke.. But the thing is I can't explain it to them. At the end of the day very few people will understand my daily struggle and I'm totally okay with that. When I'm motivated, I feel like I can conquer the world. But when I'm feeling down it seems like I'll never be able to get back up. 

There's too much going on. I know that time won't wait for me but I will always try my best to catch up. There's a lot I want to accomplish and I will continue to try despite my off days when I feel like I'm running out of time.

I refuse to believe that I only have until my wedding to do what I want with my life. Yes, my responsibilities will increase, but does that mean I have to completely give up on what makes me happy? NO. It definitely doesn't. Marriage just means that although my priorities might change, my dedication to what I do. In the back of my mind I'll always wonder if those who support me are truly there or if they're just saying it.

The mind is crazy. It controls the way you think and act. For me, it causes me to overthink and fear for the worst at every given moment. It convinces me to give up more often than it should. It makes me believe that my passions for writing, hosting, etc will never amount to anything. I'm constantly wondering 'What if I took control of my mind a year ago, 2 years, 4 years? Where would I be right now?'. I wish taking control of my anxiety was as easy as everyone makes it seem, but it's a difficult process, and every day I get closer to figuring myself out. Slowly but surely, I will overcome everything that's bringing me down. Sometime in the future I will think "What if I never took those first steps to overcoming my negative thoughts?" I'll wonder 'What if I refused to believe in myself?" but I'll never give myself the opportunity to say "What if I took that chance? or "What if I went along with this opportunity?".

West Coast Is Best Coast Part 2

I've been back for about a week now and I'm still trying to get back to my normal routine. Guess that California sunshine really took a toll on my sleeping schedule. To those who had to deal with me falling asleep during drives more than 15 minutes, I apologize. What can I say, I get sleepy!

I last left off talking about the wedding I attended. The next 4 days consisted of catching up with friends, an incredibly intelligent 12 year old's birthday (Happy Birthday once again Anisha!) and mostly FOOD. I always have a list of places I like to go when I'm out and about in the Bay, and despite the weather I got to go to most of these places. Although I can't remember exactly when I went to these restaurants I do have that list handy for anyone who's interested!

  • Yardhouse - Santana Row (the macaroni and cheese is simply to die for)
  • Cream- Get a cookie ice cream sandwich.. just do it.
  • Bombay Pizza- the Desi BBQ pizza is LIFE
  • Andersen Bakery- pretty much everything there is on point
  • Suju's Coffee- Probably the best mocha frappe I've ever tried
  • Wipeout- Pier 39 in San Fran. Great food and a great view!

Thursday was a special someone's birthday so we decided to head to Dave and Buster's and have a low key celebration because..why not! It's a big kid's Chuck-E-Cheese's with awesome food and spares you the embarrassment of being twice the age of everyone playing games around you. It was an awesome night with friends and a fantastic beginning to the amazing weekend we were about to have!

Friday came along and we had a visitor...MY MOM! After picking her up from the airport the day went by quickly with so much to do and so little time. From picking up tables and chairs, to the set up of a gorgeous backdrop by R and R Event Rentals (RamanandRaveen.com) and the women of the family gathering to fry dozens of homemade samosas, Saturday was about to be bigger than I expected. As Friday evening approached, there was another wedding event to attend. We rushed to get ready and head to the party venue where we were about an hour and a half late due to everything going on back at the house. Worried that we were a little TOO late, we rushed in to realize that we were perfectly on time. Exhausted from the day, we stayed for a couple of hours and headed back to get some much needed rest for the next day.

Saturday morning was bright and sunny as expected. I woke up at 8 to give myself enough time to deal with any last minute issues that might come up (as they always do). Thankfully, once again my hair was already done so that was one thing I didn't have to worry about. I planned everything I possibly could the night before to give me a stress free morning. It was the morning of my Takha after all! A takha, also known as a roka is a pre-engagement ceremony! Yeah...I got engaged. Well..kind of. Basically it was an engagement without the ring. This pre-engagement ceremony means that Mr. Gagan Dholi and I are now promised to each other and can start planning our wedding!

After getting myself and my mom ready, my lovely friend Harpreet and her parents picked us up and we all headed to Gagan's aunt's house for the takha. Ever since I met them, they've treated me like family. So it was only fair that they represented my side as the rest of my family couldn't make it to the event because of the last minute planning. Like the fun loving family the Bals are, we blasted some music in the car, making a grand entrance ( even though no one besides us heard the music). As we walked to the door we were greeted by the entire family.

I was going to make you all wait for part 3...but I won't.

My future in laws have a HUGE family, something that I'm not used to although my family is pretty large. Instantly I was greeted with smiles, hugs and flowers, which just happened to match my suit perfectly. We all went into the backyard where the food was being served and the set up was stunning with champagne and royal blue everywhere. Those samosas that had been made the day before...ON POINT. I would have eaten about 10 if I wasn't so worried about ruining my makeup. After being introduced to all of the members of the family we were whisked back inside to take a few pictures before everything officially began. I had been nervous all week, but surprisingly the day of I was pretty calm. Everyone crowded the living room as Gagan got down on one knee and proposed (just for pictures) and the takha began. It started off with my mom and Gagans parents feeding us laddoos and giving us shagan (blessings in the form of money). One by one each family gave us shagan and posed for pictures and that was it! After all of the pictures we went back into the backyard where we cut the cake, took more pictures, mingled with family and at last had some much awaited butter chicken! Gagan and I are always down to have some good desi chicken so we were obviously extremely excited. 

The rest of the day was pretty chill, everyone sat around, danced a bit and mingled. All of Gagan's younger cousins have already started calling me bhabhi ji (sister in law) and they were all so sweet, specially Bir who's about 4 years old. If you follow me on Snapchat or Instagram you've seen some adorable and hilarious videos of him singing "I'm in love with the coco" and saying "Damn Daniel" that day! Around 6pm both Gagan and I headed to a wedding reception! Talk about a busy day!

Overall it was a great start to our journey for Gagan and I. I'll have another blog post with pictures and more details about clothes, hair, makeup etc. from my trip. Before I end this post I'd like to thank Gagan's entire family for the hospitality, specially his parents, and Puji and Uncle Ram for generously hosting the event at their home. Thank you to Harpreet and her parents for all of their help throughout the whole planning process. Big thanks to two talented individuals, Amit and Ramanjot from Drumsoundz Entertainment for the pictures I'll be posting later on as well as the videography and a huge thanks to Raman and Raveen from R and R Event Rentals (RamanandRaveen.com) for the beautiful decor. Last but not least I'd like to thank everyone for all of your love and blessings for Gagan and I!

 

 

West Coast is Best Coast! Part 1

Hello everyone! I'm finally back after a hectic couple of weeks. With preparing for my trip and actually being in California I definitely tried to write, but it's a little difficult without access to a computer and not having any down time for over a week! 

I woke up at 4:30am on Thursday morning, running on only 3 hours of sleep and got ready for my 7:30am flight! As difficult as it was to wake up that morning, landing at 11am Cali time was totally worth it, although a can of Redbull or Monster probably would have helped me get through my day a little better. Getting through a 5 and a half hour flight without getting any sleep is probably the most irritating aspect of flying for me, but hopefully in the future I'll find a way to get some Z's!

As soon as I landed, as usual, my first stop was In N Out! Never underestimate the power of a good animal style burger, animal style fries and a Neapolitan shake right after a long flight!

On Thursday night after running around to put last minute outfit details together I attended a fun jago/sangeet/pre-wedding ceremony. This event is usually the most colorful of them all and involves close family and friends celebrating one more time before the actual wedding. I'll have another blog post coming out soon for those of you who are interested in all of the different makeup/outfit looks I came up with throughout my trip! I spent the night yawning but eventually after being awake for over 24 hours I managed to get a decent night's sleep.

Friday was full of catching up with friends and family since the wedding I was attending was on Saturday. This was when I FINALLY got to go back to a restaurant called Simply Thai in Newark, CA with one of my closest friends, Harpreet. It's by far one of my favorite Thai restaurants and it's up there with my favorite restaurants in Cali. As usual, I had the penang chicken curry that I had been craving since my last trip in December. I have yet to find a Thai restaurant in central Jersey that is just as good.I called it and early night as I was to wake up at 5am to get ready for the wedding.

Thankfully, I had curled my hair the day before and we're required to cover our head with our chunnis/duppatta/scarf/stole/whatever you want to call it so that saved me a good hour during the whole getting ready process. Although the rain put a damper on our morning (no pun intended) the anand karaj ceremony was beautiful! The groom's friends and close male family members wore mint blue paghs, bowties and pocket squares and the bridesmaids wore simple but elegant dark peach outfits while the bride and groom stuck to the traditional but radiant red and gold. Even with all the fog and rain, El Sobrante Gurdwara had a gorgeous view from it's place at the top of a huge hill and didn't fail to leave me stunned even though it was my second time there.

Since the reception was the same day, it only left us a few hours to get a power nap in and get ready once again. To my misfortune I had to forgo my pre-reception nap and get to handling the mess that was my hair after all of the rain that day. I will never understand why it ends up raining every time I'm in California although they're in a drought but I guess that's bad luck for me and great news for California! Trying to save myself some time I attempted to just touch up the makeup I already had on from the morning before but instead my face turned from a grey/black smokey eye to an "I got punched in both eyes and have flour on my face" look real quick. Of course I had to re-do all of my makeup which had me running late before I even had the opportunity to get my sari tied. After a few failed attempts and rushing over to a close family friend's house I was able to save my outfit (sacrificing the first 2 hours of the reception party). It was finally time to have some fun! Also attending was the well- known Joty Kay who also happens to be a good friend of mine although this was the first time we had met in person! We spent the night dancing and obnoxiously singing along to every song that was played and I decided that I would officially never wear a sari to a punjabi wedding reception again. During the last hour of the reception I spent more time trying to re-pin and fix my sari than on the dance floor. Big thanks to Joty and Pooja for coming to my rescue when a sari mishap was about to occur! I really don't know how some women can don saris on a daily basis with no trouble.

This post seems long enough without the rest of the details from my trip so I think I'll stop here! Stay tuned for part 2!

Quick to Blame

Tv actress Pratyusha Banerjee allegedly committed suicide earlier this week at the age of 24. Honestly speaking I didn't really know who she was until the news was all over social media but regardless, may she rest in peace.

Everyone obviously has their own opinion on this matter but a few posts really jumped out at me. I came across a few people on Facebook calling her stupid for committing suicide and saying Pratyusha shouldn't have pursued a career in Bollywood if she couldn't handle the pressure. Others said she was dumb and naive for killing herself over a guy. Every publication has written something different but so far I've heard that her ex boyfriend was engaged to someone else and I've also heard that her boyfriend/fiance was cheating on her and that she was in her second abusive relationship which caused her to take such a drastic step. No matter what the cause, shame on those people who believe she was simply stupid or dumb. Here's a bit of one of the posts I came across:

 "Its sad Pratyusha Bannerjee hung herself because her significant other did something that hurt her. Girls need to grow up or else don't join Bollywood" 

Why is it that the girls have to "grow up"? If growing up means just accepting that the man in a girl's life will cheat and treat her badly then I don't think they should grow up at all. Last time I checked, being treated badly or being hurt by a significant other isn't part of any job description. Yes, unfortunately it does happen for various reasons and people are not willing to hold themselves accountable for their actions, but does that mean a female in this industry should have to deal with all of this just because "she's in Bollywood". The person who wrote that post above was trying to justify Mr. Rahul Raj Singh's actions. Because he's a guy and guys do stupid things like this all the time right? But it's okay because eventually they'll grow up and settle down. What some people don't understand is that BEING A TERRIBLE PERSON IS NEVER OKAY. Whether relationship issues were the cause for Pratyusha's death or not, being in Bollywood doesn't mean one should be subjected to being cheated on or hurt. One of the most idiotic things that someone could think is "Well boys will be boys, girls should know how to deal with it".

Pratyusha had a lot going on in her life that we will probably never know about. Even though she did have other options, she saw suicide as her only choice. I don't think that means that she is stupid or dumb or 'not fit for Bollywood', I just think there's more to this story than we know. It's always good to have thick skin when entering a career in entertainment, but that doesn't mean that its justified for someone to be hurt or disrespected because they're 'in Bollywood'. Everyone has feelings and emotions. Remember, you are NEVER alone. There will always be other options and there will always be someone for you to talk to. Unfortunately there was no one to explain this to Pratyusha before it was too late. RIP Pratyusha Banerjee.

The Real Ones

Let's just say my life is about to get a lot more hectic than usual. Over the past year and a half I've made a lot of major changes in my life that haven't necessarily been easy, but I'm glad I made them. True friends are people you may not see for weeks, months, years or maybe you haven't even met them in person before, but they will still genuinely care for you and be there when you need them. Not having time is simply an excuse. If you care about someone enough you WILL make the time to text or call them and a true friend will always forgive you if it took you some time to get back to them. True friends kick your ass when you need it the most, proving to you that they will always have your best interest at heart. The changes I've made have caused me to no longer be close to those I used to hold dear, and I'm okay with that. These changes have made me a lot happier overall. These changes also taught me to cherish the great genuine friends that I make throughout my life. There are some people that you just click with, that understand exactly what you're going through and will say everything straight from the heart. There will be times when these friends will not just KNOW what to say, but will speak their minds and coincidentally it will be exactly what you need to hear. To those friends who I may not see or talk to often, thank you. Thank you for being there for me and supporting me without even physically being here. Thank you for genuinely and truly celebrating every happy moment with me. Thank you for giving me comfort and reassurance when I needed it. Thank you for making me laugh until my stomach hurts when it seems like I need to let loose and stop over-thinking about the small details. Thank you for joining me on this crazy roller coaster called life. 

The Struggle

Despite so many positive things happening around me, it's been a struggle to stay happy for the past week or two. Just recently I was so motivated and excited but out of no where my energy levels and positive attitude have seemed to disappear. No matter what I do I feel a sense of sadness, but I have no idea why. There's no reason for me to feel this way. I keep telling myself that, but why can't I believe it and just snap out of it? As I said in my last blog post, I can't really put my emotions into words because I don't even know why I'm feeling this way. Motivation is key and I've spent a good amount of time in the past week or so trying to get that motivation back. There was a time when I was so excited for the next morning, to start my day and be productive. Now those same tasks make me dread getting out of bed every morning. For instance, this morning I woke up feeling anxious for no particular reason. I have a big trip coming up in a little over a week but that shouldn't be bothering me. I have other important things to take care of but that's never bothered me like this before either. I hate that my happiness lasts for a short amount of time before I relapse into being the way I am right now. I hope that soon I can focus on the positive and realize that I have something to look forward to each and every day, but right now, the struggle to stay happy and positive is so real.

A Week Gone to Waste

This week I've really been struggling with my writing. It's been about a month since I started posting blogs 3x a week and I've been pretty proud of myself so far. This past week has been full of emotions and stress for reasons I don't even fully understand myself. I guess sometimes emotions get built up and get the best of me. Writing has always been my outlet, a way to vent my frustrations but there are some feelings and emotions that can't necessarily be put into words. I've allowed myself to fall behind on a few things which is absolutely unacceptable, but I hadn't found the motivation to get back on my feet until just now. The majority of this week has been wasted by me trying to take charge of my emotions and since today is Friday, I decided it would be best for me to get my sh*t together before this hectic weekend begins. Hopefully as time goes on I'll be able to learn more ways to keep myself on track and not let my emotions get in the way.  As I continue to write these blog posts, please feel free to contact me with any topics you would like for me to talk about on this blog! Not only does it give me more ideas, but it challenges me as a writer and helps me understand what everyone would like to read about! I'll also be coming out with pieces on other online publications I'm affiliated with very soon, so be sure to keep checking social media for links to those pieces as well as future posts on this site!

Thanks for the support everyone :)

Tips for Holi!

Spring is finally here! That means awesome weather, outdoor events and Holi! I had the pleasure of live streaming Holi In the City this past weekend at Stage 48 in NYC and it was a blast! I had never been to an event like this so the concept of a brunch party with Holi colors was completely new to me. Overall the event was extremely fun so if you're in the tri-state area and missed out this past weekend there will be another edition of Holi In the City at Stage 48 this coming Saturday, March 26th! For more info check out HoliInTheCity.com!

The part of Holi I tend to worry about the most is washing all of the colors off my skin, clothes and out of my hair, but thankfully the tips that I'm about to share with you had me worry-free throughout the festivities!

1. COCONUT OIL! Most people say to soak your hair in coconut oil, but it's not really the most presentable hairstyle so I have a solution. The night before the event I washed my hair after a coconut oil treatment and re-applied some more oil to the lengths of my hair- not too much, but just enough to slightly coat it and tame frizz. I applied a VERY small amount to my roots and it seemed to do the trick! When I went to wash my hair after the event the color washed right out before I even used shampoo!

2. It's always a good idea to cover as much exposed skin as possible, but if you're not ready to don a turtleneck to your next Holi party, consider covering any exposed skin with an oil like coconut, almond or baby oil or even a thick cream. This will help to prevent the color from staining your skin or drying it out!

3. A lot of people will tell you not to wear makeup because let's be honest, what's the point if we're going to get covered in colors anyways right? But I beg to differ. Wearing makeup (with a face lotion and spf) to cover my face actually saved my skin! I was able to wash the colors off along with my makeup in one go.

4. A cheap pair of shades will be your best friend. Avoid getting colors in your eyes by rocking a pair of big sunglasses! As a person who wears contact lenses on a regular basis, my shades saved me several times throughout the day when colors were unexpectedly thrown my way!

5. It's always smart to wear clothes you plan on getting rid of, but in the event that you actually want to keep your clothes, try a mixture of a couple liters of water with half a cup of white vinegar and a spoon or 2 of laundry detergent after brushing as much dry color off of your clothes as possible. I've heard that a clear window cleaning solution or fresh lemon juice could work as well although I've never tried it!

I hope this helps anyone who plans on going crazy with the colors this season!

Fitness Friday!

Hey everyone! It's been a couple of weeks since I SERIOUSLY started my fitness journey, so I thought I'd share whats going on for those of you who may be interested. Here are some of the changes I've made so far:

  • I've started drinking about 60-60oz of water every single day, starting off with 8oz as soon as I wake up in the morning
  • My breakfast either consists of eggs or oatmeal and green tea with lemon and honey
  • I've cut junk food out of my diet almost completely, although I'll treat myself to a milkshake no more than once a week
  • I've also started going to the gym about 4-6 days a week depending on my schedule
  • Doubled my amount of cardio and added more arm/leg workouts
  • I'm sticking to a healthier more vegetable based diet (plenty of lentils/daal for protein) and have made healthier food choices overall, like switching regular fries to baked sweet potato fries, regular pasta to whole wheat, etc.
  • No more late night snacks unless I'm absolutely starving

The slightly chilly weather is somewhat of an advantage because I'm able to wear a hoodie to the gym and I end up sweating a lot more. (Gross, I know, but it really does help). Obviously when the weather does eventually warm up I'll be switching to the appropriate workout gear. Initially going to the gym was exhausting and I had no energy to get through the rest of the day. I'd often work out every other day because I was too tired, but I now find myself more energetic AFTER my workouts rather than before. I've also been sleeping better at night and my metabolism is starting to speed up, helping me lose about 2 lbs of excess weight so far! I'm really happy that I've started to see and feel the results! It's tedious and I dread going to the gym most days but I realized I never regret working out. I'll always feel guilty about skipping a workout but I'll never feel guilty about pushing myself to go to the gym, even if I don't finish my complete workout. Anything is better than nothing!

My Favorite Female DJs!

From the title you probably guessed what this post is about. Before I get into the details of each DJ (in no particular order), I want to thank everyone on this list, and even those I haven't included, for being great role models to the other females in our community who wish to pursue a career in the entertainment industry. I look up to these women not only for their skill and talent, but also because of their attitudes, persistence and great personalities.

DJ Shilpa/ DJ Scarlett88

Shilpa was exposed to the DJ world at a young age. With her father being a DJ, she learned the trick of the trade at 12 years old and only grew from there. Growing up playing and writing music, she went to NYC's Dubspot DJ School and is an Ableton Live Certified Producer. Shilpa is such an amazing person. Not only does she have the skill to rock a huge party, whether it's a club or a wedding, but she is also one of the most inspiring people I've come across. Any time I've ever had doubts about my career path Shilpa has always been there with much needed words of wisdom. Shilpa is one DJ who has and will continue to prove people wrong when they assume that a female in this industry is not as skilled or talented as a man. The couple of times I've met with Shilpa she's been so incredibly kind. Initially totally fangirling, I was pleasantly surprised when we were having a normal conversation as if I had known her for years. With us both following in our fathers’ footsteps career wise, but also making a name for ourselves, it was great to receive Shilpa's input and advice. Shilpa told me that there will always be people who try to put others down, but that if you remain dedicated and strong, your work will always prove those people wrong. Follow DJ Shilpa on Instagram

DJ Harpz

From a young age Harpz had a clear vision of what she wanted to do. After much persistence, commitment and determination Harpz got her break and was given a slot on her local Radio Station - Fever FM. Her fanbase grew with time and soon she was offered a prime drive-time slot.  Harpz then got the opportunity to host her own Urban show, on “All Star FM”.  She is now the weekend Breakfast Presenter on the BBC Asian Network on Sundays from 6am. Along with all of this, Harpz also DJs private events! First off, anyone who can wake up to go to work at 6am on a Sunday is nothing less than a hero in my book. Harpz is a prime example of what hard work, talent and determination can do. Even with all of the success she's attained over the years, Harps remains down to Earth, constantly interacting with fans and supporters over social media. Giving fans a look at her everyday life on Snapchat, she shows the world that despite all of her success, she is still a fun-loving, family-oriented and very humble person. As far as I've been able to tell, she's always looking to take the next step in her career, always striving to reach new goals and that truly motivates me to keep moving forward with my dreams as well. Follow DJ Harpz on Instagram!

DJ Goddess

Jessica Dhillon aka DJ Goddess is a model and actress turned DJ/Film Producer/Choreographer.  She has opened for the likes of Down With Webster and also co-produced Raghav's "Top of the World" video alongside the UK's Harry Sona. With a Major in Biology and Minor in Business, she went from a geek to an international female DJ!  Her first tour kicked off with DJ KSR at one of the biggest North American Culture Shows (NACS) in Toronto and she went on to spin alongside RDB and DJ Shadow Dubai for NYE in Dubai. Her second tour schedule consisted of shows in Mumbai and Dubai, followed by her debut in London. DJ Goddess also made her debut in New York City at the end of 2013. This woman can literally do it all! DJ Goddess is a prime example of the saying 'You can do anything you put your mind to'. Who would have thought that this girl getting her degree in biology would end up DJing at some of the hottest spots in the world? I'm extremely impressed with the fact that she can rock out a set in Mumbai and walk out still looking absolutely flawless! Follow DJ Goddess on Instagram!

DJ Rekha

British-born, NYC-based, DJ Rekha is a DJ, curator, record label owner and educator. Rekha established herself in 1997 with her ever so popular event Basement Bhangra and she was the first to present artists Panjabi MC, Tigerstyle, and M.I.A in the United States. In 2010 at a White House Asian Pacific Islander reception,  President Obama said, "I want to thank DJ Rekha who's been spinning a little East Room Bhangra for everybody, mixing a hip-hop beat with the sounds of her heritage, making a uniquely American sound that may not have been heard in the White House before.”   She's also given lectures and led workshops on Hip Hop, politics and South Asian art for various universities and institutions, including the Smithsonian, Brooklyn Museum and Columbia University. If that wasn't enough, her work has been featured on CNN, NPR, PBS! I could go on and list all of Rekha's other accomplishments but you would all be reading for ages! I've looked up to her since I started gaining interest in Bhangra and over the years Rekha has never failed to be an amazing inspiration! Follow DJ Rekha on Instagram!

 

What Bhangra Team Are You On?

 

Anyone who knows anything about me knows that bhangra is a huge part of my life although I've never danced on a team. For years I've gotten criticism and doubts over this passion of mine. Some may laugh and say I'm trying too hard to fit in to a scene I don't belong in and some may say I think I feel as though I'm too good to dance on a team. The truth is, I've ALWAYS wanted to dance, but life got in the way. I started off my college career at a school that didn't have a bhangra team and as time went on, I realized that I simply couldn't dedicate myself to practices because of other things in my life. I thought that if I was going to join a team, I should be fully committed and I knew this wasn't a possibility at the time.

My love for bhangra first began in middle school. I had just moved to a new town and just as I had been my whole life, I was a loner. As if that wasn't enough, I quickly became the "weird new girl". I have to admit, I was a really awkward child and I don't think I'll ever get past my 'awkward stage', but I'd like to think I've improved at my socializing skills over time. Anyways, as the school year went on, the bullying got worse and so did my loneliness. I would run home from school and lock myself in my room for the rest of the afternoon to waste my time on Youtube. One day, as I was browsing different videos, I came across performances by various bhangra teams. One thing led to another and within no time I was imitating the steps to the best of my abilities. I realized as time went on that bhangra had turned into my escape. I dreaded waking up every morning, but started to gain hope as I knew that once I got myself through the dreadful school day of more loneliness and getting picked on, I would be able to forget all of my troubles and do something I truly loved.

I had never been so passionate about anything before. Soon, bhangra turned into the one aspect of my life that pulled me out of depression. No matter how terrible I was, I was completely dedicated to learning as much as I could. I was so obsessed that multiple times throughout middle and high school, my parents had to resort to banning me from doing bhangra for days at a time when I got in trouble. Over the years, I managed to make amazing friends and do other things that make me happy, but bhangra always held a special place in my heart for making me happy when I thought I would never smile again.

Since those days bhangra has always been a huge part of my life. I can honestly say that bhangra is the main reason why those scary horrific thoughts I would have every night disappeared.

People will always make assumptions as to why I love bhangra so much, and that's fine. I'll always get criticized for not joining a team and that's also fine. The truth is that whether I'm on a team or not, whether I'm performing or not, whether there's someone watching or not,  bhangra will always be my getaway. For me, it will never be about winning a trophy. It has been, and always will be, about my own happiness whether I'm watching a performance or on stage myself.

11 Tips to Avoid Laziness

Happy Friday!

Let me start off by saying that I am NOT a morning person by any means, but here are some tips that help me get through the day when all I feel like doing is chilling in bed and watching Netflix.

1. Drink a glass of water before bed the night before. I know that when I do this I'll HAVE to get up to use the bathroom in the morning and that helps me with the most difficult part of my day!

2. On days when I'm especially sleepy I like to open the blinds of the window right next to me, The sunlight isn't only refreshing but it wakes me up within minutes and puts me in a good mood within minutes!

3. Drink a glass of water as soon as you open your eyes. Studies have proven that this does actually wake you up, sometimes even more than coffee. It will re-hydrate you and help with your metabolism as well! The last thing I feel like doing in the morning is drinking a glass of water, but it's so worth it considering all of the benefits!

4. Take care of your most important tasks in the morning! It's said that people are usually more productive in the mornings, so take advantage of it! If you're a procrastinator like me, you'll definitely thank yourself when you have the evening free to meet up with friends or catch up on your favorite show!

5.Use the mornings to treat yourself! It'll help you out of bed faster knowing you have something to look forward to whether it's your favorite breakfast, coffee, or a cute outfit (which you should probably pick out the night before because we're trying to be productive here!)

6. Even if you're just running errands for the day or working from home, get out of those sweats! Put on some jeans or leggings and a cute top (or even just nicer sweats) and actually make an effort to get ready! Not only will you look great, but you'll feel great. And, in the event that you have a last minute plans, you're already ready to go (plus you'll have an excuse to take more selfies if you're into that). I'll be filming a quick 5 minute minimal makeup routine soon so be sure to look out for it on my YouTube channel!

7. Break down each larger tasks into smaller tasks. It'll help you feel like you've accomplished more without tiring you out or boring you and they won't seem as intimidating, possibly eliminating the cause for your laziness!

8. If you're one of those people who can't seem to stay focused for long periods of time without being distracted or end up taking a nap when you should be getting work done, try changing your environment. Drive down to your local coffee shop for library. Caffeine is always helpful and the different environment will keep you awake, plus there's nowhere for you to sleep when you're in public.

9. Have a vision of what and who you want to be. What goals do you want to accomplish? What do you need to do to achieve those goals? How will you benefit from completing these tasks?  If that doesn't work, think about the consequences if you don't reach these goals. Motivation is key! 

10. Follow inspirational social media accounts or sign up to have daily quotes emailed to you! Some of the websites I've signed up to get emails from are finestquotes.com and sevenquotes.com.

11. This is probably my biggest tip: Just get up and get things done! Stop waiting until later to do something you can do RIGHT NOW! I've taken this approach to my blog posts and it's worked wonders for my mood. Knowing I've accomplished certain tasks earlier in the day that I won't need to worry about any more gives me peace of mind and I'm able to get ahead on work for the next day! 

Be happy, stay motivated, get up, and go achieve your goals! Work so that by the end of the day you feel a sense of accomplishment (and maybe treat yourself to some guilt free Netflix watching).

 

Happy International Women's Day!

 

The other day on one of the Desi TV channels I came across a promotion ad for a new show. The guy had just broken his leg and a friend of his came to visit him with flowers to see how he was doing. When asked how he was feeling he said something along the lines of, "Only women cry about little injuries like this, I'm a man so I'll take it like one" (roughly translated from Hindi)

The woman, taken back a bit, went on to say that the pain of giving birth is equivalent to 20 bones getting fractured at the same time (shots fired!!).The moral of the story is that despite the world thinking that women are weak, fragile beings, we are actually physically and mentally stronger. 

Ladies, in this day and age we can accomplish anything we put our mind to, specially when we put on our favorite pair of heels. For me, it's always been a struggle to be taken seriously in a typically male-dominated industry, but I'm determined to pull through and make a name for myself. My Dad used to get constant criticism from his peers for letting me do certain things like my radio show, hosting events, etc. But he never once told me to abandon my passion. He taught me pretty much everything he would teach a son, if he had one. My Dad was one man who was never ashamed of having a daughter. In fact, according to stories I've heard, when my mom was pregnant with me he wished for a daughter. As soon as I born he was so happy he carried me in his arms and ran into the waiting room to show me to my maternal grandmother. Of course, he was banned from coming near me until I was taken home because the staff thought he was trying to kidnap me. But if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be sitting here writing this blog. I would not have the courage to do what makes me happy without him telling me that a woman is no less than any man. So I'm here telling you beautiful ladies who are reading this that you are strong. Be fierce, be persistent and do what makes YOU happy.

  Someone will still always ask if me going to events away from home is risky or dangerous even though I'll be on stage the whole time, but I've never heard that question directed towards a man. Obviously, we as women need to take certain precautions, but no fear or hint of danger should hold us back(that's what pepper spray is for). 

There is no reason as to why we cannot accomplish the goals we set for ourselves. We take on so many roles during our lifetime such as that of a daughter, sister, aunt, mother, etc. There's no reason as to why we can't add roles like 'entrepreneur', 'CEO', 'president', etc. to that list as well. 

 

Not One of Them

Earlier this week I came across two co-workers sitting down to discuss work matters. I didn't think much of them going down their list of names of clients and I continued to mind my own business and do my work until they came across a name they didn't know how to pronounce. 

The man said something along the lines of "The guy's name sounds so Indian. When you see his name you wouldn't think he knows any English but you talk to him on the phone and you would think he was one of us. He's probably a 3rd generation or something because his English was perfect. Imagine if we had to deal with his father or grandfather instead." 

First off, if he had known I was Indian, would he still have said this? What made this man think that it was socially acceptable for him to make this comments and why would he assume that someone with an ethnic last name wouldn't know English? Also, "...you would think he was one of us." What exactly is that supposed to mean? It bothers me that in such a diverse society ethnic minorities are still looked down upon by some.

A couple of weeks ago another incident occurred. I took my mother to see a doctor and the nurse kept directing all questions and comments to me rather than her. When she did speak to my mother she spoke very loudly and slowly, assuming she wouldn't be understood. This nurse was shocked when she was told that my mother has been in this country for almost 25 years and worked at the headquarters of a major company for 20 of those years, but still continued to ask me all the questions referring to my mother as 'she' although my mom was the one answering all of the questions. 

It angers me when the people we encounter on a daily basis assume that someone with a different name or accent does not fit in to society. The truth is, people have a certain view on who is the 'average American'. So if these people were to change their opinion on who is considered and average American to not just someone of European descent, but anyone who is culturally or ethnically different than them, wouldn't that solve the problem? 

How Rude!

)This is a post that was written earlier this week when it was actually nice out and not snowing)

Today is just one of those days when everyone I encounter is just in a grouchy mood despite the amazing weather and sunshine out. I've tried to park in 3 different parking spots before realizing that others had parked taking up multiple spaces, one lady decided it would be okay to steal the parking spot I had been waiting for, and I got yelled at for taking one extra second to say 'thank you' to someone for (barely) holding the door open for me.

Luckily I've been in such a positive mood lately that things like this haven't really been getting to me. I get that people may be having bad days blah blah blah but IT TAKES 0% EFFORT TO BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING!

As I'm writing this there's a man yelling at the barista at this coffee shop for making his drink iced instead of hot even though I heard him clearly asked for an iced latte. 

What I don't understand is why people who are in a rotten mood pass it on to others they encounter throughout the day. I get that we don't know what anyone may be going through but is that really a reason for a complete stranger to yell in your face for no apparent reason? We wouldn't get strangers involved in our personal problems so why pass negative energy on to a stranger? Personally I think we can all just fake a smile once in a while and be nice to people! Who knows maybe by being polite to those around you will put you in a better mood and make you feel better!

I'm not going to sit here and say I didn't get super annoyed or that I wasn't tempted to yell back at that lady earlier today, but I don't see the point in ruining my day because someone else is in a bad mood. Of course people are probably dealing with worse than I am, but having a positive mindset no matter how bad your day is going is so important! With all of these terrible crimes being committed around the world and in our own country, with hate becoming seemingly more prominent in our communities, we all NEED to spread the positive vibes and that starts with the random people we encounter on a daily basis.  We're all human!

I have a lot more to say about this topic so you'll be seeing a video about this on my YouTube channel very soon!