August 18th, 2016
The 22nd will mark 2 years since I lost my Dad. It's crazy how when I was a child I loved the month of August but now I dread it. There hasn't been a day this week that I haven't randomly cried. Every time I'm alone I think about all the things I wish I could tell him. All I've been able to do is cry. There hasn't been a single day in these past two years that I haven't thought about him. Sometimes I feel as if he was the only person who truly understood me. There was a time when I could barely get through a day or two without seeing him. It's now been two years and the pain hasn't gotten any better. I can't stop crying and I'm desperately hoping that typing my feelings out will help. There's so much I want to say to him, yet every time I think of him my mind fills up with fog and my eyes fill up with tears. All I can say right now is that I REALLY miss him. I hate that I'll be missing him for the rest of my life. I wish he was still here. Every time I start planning wedding details only one thought comes to mind: My dad won't be there.I don't think I'll ever understand why God had to take the most important person in my life.